From the deep depths of human gullibility and intellectual lowliness, rises the great Loch Ness monster of stupidity.
Lousiana is the new seat of utterly amazing inanity. Thousands of school children in the state will be handed over biology textbooks which will claim that the Loch Ness monster, aka Nessie, actually exists and this disproves the Darwinian theory of evolution. All of this at the expense of the public treasury.
Accelerated Christian Education
There are many private schools under the fundamentalist system of education Accelerated Christian Education (ACE) and these are funded by the state. Their agenda is very simple: providing a Bible-based system of education as an alternative to the accepted curriculum. The bad news is that these kind of schools are on the rise.
These schools give a large dose of Biblical ‘facts’ and are known for being intellectually dishonest. Noah’s Flood is taught to be literal, young Earth creationism finds its pride of place in this nook, after being denied entry into scientific circles and Darwinism is criticized with a zeal that can only be called fundamentalist. Their latest strategy: dig up an age-old mythical monster from the depths of a lake in Scotland.
The monster from Loch Ness …
The Loch Ness monster is a mythical creature residing in Loch Ness in the highlands of Scotland. There has been no definitive sighting of the creature and the evidence of its existence is minimal and highly controversial. The photographic evidence is blurry and the sonar readings conducted for many years on the lake have turned up zilch. Even dedicated expeditions have turned up nothing concrete. Loch Ness believers say that the monster is a living dinosaur, which has somehow escaped the great Cretaceous extinction 65 million years ago. The creature ought to be a plesiosaur, a species of long-necked dinosaurs.
… and lying to children
So now, ACE has picked up on this and has been trying to teach kids that since this monster might exist,Darwin is wrong! Here’s a sample:
Are dinosaurs alive today? Scientists are becoming more convinced of their existence. Have you heard of the ‘Loch Ness Monster’ in Scotland? ‘Nessie’ for short has been recorded on sonar from a small submarine, described by eyewitnesses, and photographed by others. Nessie appears to be a plesiosaur.
But, you’re confused. How does this ‘prove’ that creationism is right? Simple, it doesn’t! But let’s hear about it anyway. Jonny Scaramanga, who campaigns against Christian education system, explains:
[Nessis is] evidence that evolution couldn’t have happened. The reason for that is they’re saying if Noah’s flood only happened 4000 years ago, which they believe literally happened, then possibly a sea monster survived. If it was millions of years ago then that would be ridiculous. That’s their logic. It’s a common thing among creationists to believe in sea monsters.
Makes perfect sense, right?
Not even wrong
Ultimately, it’s more serious than just poking fun. You cannot afford to muck around with the heads of children and indoctrinate them with whatever fundamentalist logic that suits your taste. The scary part of all this is that this intense scientific opposition, being driven into fertile young minds, is funded by big money. The kind of money flowing into this creationist movement, often under the guise of necessary ‘funding’, being distributed to many organizations like the shrewdly named ‘Discovery Institute’, is much larger than the amounts flowing into science for all fields of research.
It is one thing that myths are taught in childhood, but it is completely another that myths are taught as reality, just to undermine actual science. A 2000 year old book cannot take precedence over the dedicated efforts of so many scientists over so many years.
It’s time we rise from the depths of inane stupidity.